STORIES OF HOPE

Journeys from Addiction to Recovery

Introduction:

This collection of compelling narratives delves into the lives of individuals who have faced the arduous path of addiction, providing a profound exploration of their journey from dependency to recovery. Through personal accounts, we gain invaluable insights into the factors that led to addiction, the harrowing challenges endured, and ultimately, the triumphs of these individuals as they reclaim their lives. Join us as we uncover the gripping tales of addiction, the depths of suffering, and the remarkable stories of survival that inspire hope.

In order to protect the privacy of our clients we have changed the real names of persons and places in this story.

ناوړه مشوره

Bad Advice

يوه ورځ زه د كار كولو په نيت د ايران په لور وخوځېدم. هلته راته جوته شوه چې د كار لپاره ايران ته تللي افغانانو كې يو زيات شمېر په  نشه ئې توكو روږدي دي!

زه چې د نشه ئې توكو د زيانونو څخه خبر ؤم ووېرېدم چې مبادا پدې بلا ككړ نشم، هغه ؤو چې هوډ مې وكړ او بېرته خپل ټاټوبي ته راستون شوم، دلته در اتلو سره سم د ATC په نوم د ماين پاكولو په يوه مؤسسه كې په دنده وګمارل شوم. يوه ورځ د هرات په ښار كې د ما ين د چاودنې له آمله ټپي شوم او په كابل كې د فرا نسويانو په روغتون كې د درملنې لاندې ونيول شوم. د درملنې  په دوران  كې به مې بدن ډېر درد كاوه كله به چې زما شكايت زيات شونو ډاكترانو به يو بل ته دا لفظ ووايه: مورفين، مورفين….

One day I decided to go to Iran if I could find a job, it was cleared to me there that majority of Afghans coming to Iran for work are addicted.

As I was aware of drug hazards so afraid not to become addicted, and so I decided to return to my homeland, and by my arriving to Afghanistan was employed in demining organization (ATC). One day I severely injured because of mine explosion while working in Heart province, and then referred to the French hospital in Kabul, and during the days of my stay in the hospital I was suffering from body pain and when my pain was sever the doctors whispering Morphine, Morphine in between them. After discharge from the hospital the voice of heroin remained in my ears and then I was using morphine to relieve my body pain

د روغتون څخه د رخصتېدو وروسته مې همدغه الفاظ په غوږو كې ؤو ما به د خپل درد د كمولو لپاره مورفين اخيستل او استعمالول.

 يوه ورځ زما يودوست چې په نشه ئي موادو روږدى ؤو زما د پوښتنې لپاره زما كور ته راغى هغه راته مشوره راكړه چې ته د دردونو لپاره د پوډرو سګريت وڅكوه ما په همدې كار پيل وكړ، بالاخره ما د پوډرو د استعمال ټولې لارې زده كړې، مګر زما دغه عمل د خپلې كورنى څخه پټ ؤو.

One day, one of my peers who was addicted to narcotics, came to my house to take care of me, he recommended to me to smoke heroin in a cigarette and I did so, finally I was familiar with all the processes in using heroin, but my performances were hidden from my family.

زما ښځه چې يوه روغتيايي كاركوونكې ده كله به چې وظيفې ته ولاړه ما به په خپل كور كې په پټه دغه عمل تر سره  كاوه. يوه ورځ نوموړې د كار د ځاى څخه وختي كور ته راغله  زه يې د نشه ئي توكو د استعمال په حا ل كې وليدم، بې اختياره

يې په چيغو پيل وكړ، سر تندى يې وواه او ويې ويل: دا څه كوې؟ ولې؟ ولې؟…

As my wife is a medical worker and she was going to job I was performing my addiction tasks in the house reamined hidden. One day she came earlier from her job and found me using drug and started crying on me: what are you doing… why? Why?

زه د خپلې ښځې آه و فرياد ډېر زيات پښيمانه كړم او هوډ مې وكړ چې زه به دغه بد عمل پرېږدم، څو ځلې مې په كور كې پرېښودو ته ملا وتړله مګر ونه توانېدم. آخر په نشه ئي توكو د روږدو ددرملنې  د مركزونو په لټه كې شوم. له ډېرو زياتو پلټنو وروسته

دې نتيجې ته ورسېدم چې زه بايد هغه مركز يا روغتون ته لاړ شم كوم چې په ګردېز كې د روږدو ددرملنې په منظور فعاليت كوي. دلته له يوې مياشتې درملنې وروسته زه اوس يو عادي ژوند تر سره كوم.

My wife’s crying dued me and decided to leave this bad tasks, I decided to leave the addiction in home but was not succeeded, finally started to find a therapeutic center for addicts. After seeking and investigation I decided to go to the Gardez TC, operating for the treatment of addict, and after completion of one month treatment course now I am living as a normal individual.

زه اوس يوه كورودانه او يوه لور لرم او د خپل ژوند د خوښۍ شپې ورځې تيروم.

Now I have a wife and a daughter and am happy with my life.

زندگی دوباره

My second life

شیما زنی است خوش اخلاق و زیبا اما درد درونی وی را خیلی زرد و ضعیف نشان میدهد به گفته خودش

 اشک در چشمان من طوفان غم دارد هنوز

 خنده  بر لب میزنم  تا  کس  نداند  راز من

چه کنم چاره ندارم غم من از حد گذشته میدانم که اضافه از یک سال عمر ندارم بخاطریکه غم زیاد را دیده ام و فعلا معتاد هم هستم شنیده ام که معتاد عمر کوتاه دارد من هم از جمله آنها هستم زندگی ام برباد شده و بر باد فناه رفته بعد از چند بار رفت و آمد به سنتر قصه زندگی اش را چنین گفت : خواهر عزیز امید که از شنیدن قصه من شما اذیت نشوید و شاید که از درد دل من کم شود اشک به چشمانش غلبه کرد اما با شجاعت و مردانگی جلوش را گرفت و گفت: تقریبآ بیست و پنج سال پیش با مردی ازدواج کردم که وضع اقتصاد تقریبآ متوسط داشت یکسال را به خوشی گذشتاندیم اما بعد از یک سال عروسی بدبختی من شروع شد چون شوهرم بد گفتار و بد گذاره بود از من پنهان چرس می کشید وقتی که پول چرس را نمیداشت و یا چرس نمیافت  بسیار بد گویی می کرد و ناسزا می گفت و به این قسم پنج سال را گذاره کردیم از بد اخلاقی شوهرم حوصه ام به سر رسید بالاخره دست به خودکشی زدم نزد خانم همسایه که همیشه راز دار من بود و خودش تریاک را دود می کرد رفتم و گفتم مادر… . جان کمی برایم تریاک بده که حوصله ام خلاص شده دلم می خواهد که زندگی ام را با تمام غمهایش خاتمه بدهم

Shaima is a nice and with good morale woman, but her internal pain made her very weak pale, as she says:

Still there is river of tears in my eyes 

“ My smile is to hidden my secrets

What can I do, my grieves are not tolerable any more, I feel not have more than one year in this world, because of my problems and addiction as well. I have heard that addicts live for short period and I am included them and my life has been collapsed, after coming several times to the center she explained her life story as following:

My dear sister! I hope not to disturbed by telling my story, but probably my stress would release, a flood of tears appeared in her eyes, but she bravely controlled her tears.” Almost 25 years before I married with a man whose economic state was fair and was happy with him for one year, but after one year of our marriage my bad luck has been started, because my husband became misdeed and was smoking hashish hidden. When there was no money to buy hashish or could not be able to find he was telling bad words and so I passed five years more with him, finally his bad performances were out of my tolerance and decided to kill myself, I went to a lady who was one of our neighbors and was keeping always my secrets and was smoking opium and told her “Mother….. Give me some opium I want to kill myself to relieve my stress, because the stress is not tolerable any more”. 

اما مادر … جان بالایم قهر شد و گفت تو دیوانه شدی دو تا طفل خود را به کی میمانی میگذاری که بدبخت شوند آخر مادر دو اولاد هستی چطور زندگی را ترک میکنی غم غلط کردن راه ها و چاره دارد مادرت که من هستم از غم های زیاد تریاک را دود می کنم و غم خود را همرای تریاک تقسیم کرده ام بیا که من چاره غمهایت را بکنم پس مادر جان هر چه زودتر و گرنه من دیوانه خواهم شد با عجله به پس خانه رفت چلمش را آورد کمی تنباکو را به دست خود مالش داد و بعد کمی تریاک را میده کرد همرای آب چلم تنباکو و تریاک را کمی نم کرد و خوب آنها را یکجا کرد بالای چلم انداخت و گفت حالا غم های تو هم بین چلم و تریاک تقسیم میشودوقتی که چند دود از آن کش کردم سرم گیج شد هیچ چیز را نمی فهمیدم صرف کمی احساس خوشی می کردم و کمی از غمهایم کم شد بی خبر از اینکه غم کم شد ولی عمرم تباه شد من به تریاک عادت کردم و پنهان از فامیل وقتیکه شوهرم بیرون میرفت کمی تریاک و تنباکو را یکجا کرده بالای چلم دود می کردم یک روز شوم که شوهرم من را گیر کرد بالایم غضب شد و من را لت و کوب کرد به من معتاد گفت زن بی شرم تو این تنباکو بد بو را نشه میکنی من گفتم پس تو چرا چرس میکشی کمی شرمنده شد و به من گفت چلم نکش بخاطریکه قوم و خویش ما اگر بدانند به اولاد های ما طعنه میزنند که شما اولاد معتاد هستید بسیار روز ها را به جگر خونی تیر می کردم بلاخره خوردن تریاک را شروع کردم چون طاقت نداشتم اما هر قدر که ظلم بالایم میشد بسیار کم فکرش را می کردم بخاطریکه بسیار وقت را به تریاک پناه میبردم  در بعضی جاها عکس های معتادین را میبینم که چقدر مواد مخدر نقص دارد خیلی جگر خون می شوم اما چاره ندارم چون اگر یک روز تریاک نخورم مثل دیوانه ها میشوم یک روز در همین چرت بودم که از طریق بلند گو مسجد سخی شنیدم که تریاک و چرس و تمام مواد مخدر قابل تداوی است آنقدر خوش شدم که اصلآ باورم نمیاید آنقدر خوش شدم که اصلا از عمرم حساب نبود چرا که دلم بخاطر اولادهایم میسوخت بخاطر یکه پدرشان معتاد چرس بود و خودم به صورت پنهانی معتاد تریاک بودم فکر میکردم که اولاد هایم به زودی بی پدر و مادر میشوند حالا که من به بسیار خاطر جعمی همرای شوهرم آمدم تا به این جا تداوی شویم آیا راستی که تریاک و چرس تداوی دارد شوهرم را خیلی زاری کردم و به این جا آوردم به همین بهانه خودم را نیز میخواهم تداوی کنم  بعد از یکماه مشوره گرفتن داخل تداوی شد و ضمآ تداوی خود را تکمیل کرد و از تداوی خیلی راضی است و میگوید من فکر می کنم که دوباره زنده شده ام اما بعد از سه ماه شوهرش نیز بستر شده و تداوی شد و از مرکز زندگی نوین بسیار خوش هستند و از زحمت کشی کارمندان خیلی تشکری میکنند میگویند فامیل ما زندگی جدید و نوین را از نو آغاز کردیم .

But, the lady was angry at me and said “are crazy! To whom you left your two children to become miserable! Finally you are the mother of two children how you can leave life! There are lots of ways to relieve pains and stresses! Your mother (the lady) is smoking opium and divides pains with opium, let me treat you and release your stress and pain! I told her. ”mother! Hurry please; help me as soon as possible! Otherwise I well became crazy”. Then she returned to her home and brought hookah with her, she rubbed some of tobacco and mixed with opium made it wet by adding few drops of water to it and put in chillum, and told me” now your stress and pains will be divided between hookah and opium” and after few smokes I got dizziness(vertigo) and not aware of any thing but just felt just a little pleasure and a little of my stress was released not aware of (that my stress was released but my life was destroyed) and I was addicted to opium. When my husband was out of home I mixed some tobacco with opium and smoke it in chillum hidden. One unlucky day he found me while I was smoking opium and became very angry at me and punished and hit me and said” shameless and addicted woman! Are you smoking this bad smelling tobacco? I replied “why do you smoke hashish then and he became shamed a little and told me” don’t smoke chillum, because if our relatives know that you are smoking. They well say to our children that “your mother is an addict”. And so I passed many days with sorrows; finally I started to ingest opium, because it was easier than to smoke in hookah and so I was tolerating  grieves well and even I was not thinking about it. In some places when I see the photos of addicts, I can feel how dangerous the narcotics are! And this make me very sad, but I can’t do any thing, because if one day I don’t ingest opium become as a mad. One day I was thinking about my problems and heard from the loudspeakers of Sakhi Mosque” addiction to all narcotics including opium and hashish is treatable!” then I became so happy that can’t explain to you in words, because I was thinking about the future of our miserable children whose father is addicted to hashish and I was ingesting opium hidden and I felt that our children will become parentless very soon. And I brought my husband and promoted for treatment confidentially, is it true that addiction is treatable? If I could be treated here it will be a good chance for me!

After one month counseling she has completed the treatment course successfully, and is satisfied with the services rendered during treatment course, and thinks she got life again. Her husband was also treated in Zendagi-e-Nawin TC and he is also satisfied from Zendagi-e-Nawin TC.  

خبر خوش

Good news

هنوز طفل بودم مثل گلی نو شگفته در دامن پاک و پر محبت مادر خود پر پر می کردم پدرم  دهقان بود مادرم همرایش به کار ها کمک میکرد به گفته آنها من یک طفل ناراحت بودم خانه مان در ولسوالی واخان بود راهی طولانی را در پیش داشتیم دور از داکتر و دوا پدر و مادرم نمیتوانستند که مرا به داکتر ببرند روزی مادرم حیران و پریشان در خانه نشسته بود که یک زن که … نام داشت به خانه ما آمد برای مادرم گفت : چرا پریشان هستی؟ مادرم جواب داد از دست این دختر آن زن گفت : چرا؟ مادرم گفت او بسیار نارام است مرا بکار نمی ماند آن زن گفت من برایت یک چیز می گویم که در حق من دعای نیک کنید مادرم گفت چی؟ زن گفت کمی تریاک برایش بده مادرم که یک زن بیسواد وازاضرر آن بی خبر بود گپ او را قبول کرد برای من تریاک داد من بخواب رفتم البته مدت طولانی مادرم از خوشحالی در لباس نمی گنجید پدرم همچنان همه روزه از آن زن استقبال می کردند زندگی ما همین قسم پیش می رفت هر روز برایم مقدار از تریاک میداد خودشان مصروف کارهای دهقانی در مزرعه که داشتیم میبودند این زهر کشنده و تباه کننده جسم ، قاتل آینده درخشان انسان که من معتاد به این زهر که آفتاب روشن را بشام تار میسازد دچار شده بودم  زندگی که داشتیم از دست دادیم خانه و دوکان  زمین همه را برای من بفروش رساندن تا جان مرا نجات دهند من حالا بیست ودو ساله هستم بعد از روز های آفتاب درخشان طلوع کرد پدرم به شهر رفته بود در برگشت ازشهررنگ پدرم تغیر کرده با خوشی داخل حویلی شد برایم گفت دخترم دیگر رنگ ترا مانند زعفران زرد نخواهم دید  من نمی توانستم از خوشی حرف بزنم به بسیار تلاش گفتم چرا چرا ؟ پدرم گفت وقتیکه به شهر رفتم من در آنجا یک دفتری را دیدم که نوشته بود زندگی نوین  از یک نفر پرسان کردم که این چی معنی دارد او گفت : کاکا جان این جایی است که معتادین مواد مخدر تداوی می شوند باز پرسان کردم به قیمت چند او تکرار کرد که رایگان حالا ترا به آنجا میبرم مرا به آنجا بردند توسط داکتران اناث ورزیده زحمت کش که شب وروز را بفکر معتادین به سر میبرند تداوی شدم و شکر خدا حالا آینده درخشان و بدون نشه را در پیش دارم  این بود داستان زندگی من که مادرم فریب خورده بود به امید اینکه دیگر پدرران و مادران  و جوانان ما فریب این دیو سیاه را نخورند تا اسیر آن نشوند.

Since many years a go I was a child and was growing in my mother bosom as flower in the garden. My father was a peasant and my mother was helping him in farm works, according to my parents I was an irritable child, we were living in Wakhan an isolated district of Badakhshan province where there is no medical facilities and so my parents were not able to show me to a physician for the remedy of my irritability. One day my mother was setting sorry for my illness, a lady… came to our house and told to my mother” why you are so sad? My mother replayed” because of this child” the lady said “why? And my mother replied “she is very irritable and don’t allow me to do my work” the lady told her” I will show you something useful for the treatment of your child and you will prey for me all the time” my mother told her” what is that” the lady said” give her some opium”, as my mother was illiterate woman and was not aware of hazards of opium, accepted her recommendation and gave me some opium and after that I went to deep sleep, my mother was so happy for my calmness, my father was very happy for the remedy recommended by the lady and always acknowledged her and thankful for  her  recommendation. Days were passing one after other and they were giving me opium and I was receiving my daily dose of opium that had darken my life’s brightness and  so they were able to work in their farms for long time and so I was addicted to opium. And it caused lots of losses for us. My father sold the shops and lands to prepare money for my remedy to rescue my life.

Now I am 22 years old and after long dark nights the Sun of my bright days was shining, because my father went to city, after returning to home he was very happy, and told me “ I can’t see you sick any more” and I asked vigorously “Why,?)  He replied” when I went to Faizabad City I saw an organization over there by the name of Zendagi-e-Nawin! When I asked: What is this organization for? They said “this is the place where addicts are treated. Then I asked them how much it will cost? They said” all services here in center are free of charge. Now I want to take you to the treatment center! And I went with him and was treated with the support and services of the female staff of the center, because they always think about and take care of their addict patients. Thanks from God, now I am free of drugs and perform my daily activities perfectly. And that is the end of my life story. I hope, the parents of all afghan children not to use opium for calmness of their qualified children.

مشوره نادرست دوستان

Peer’s bad advice

وی عامل اصلی معتاد شدن خود را چنین می نویسد:

He wrote his main addiction cause as following:

One of my peers (son of my aunt) invited me to smoke cigarette for the first time, as I was just 10 years old ordinary kid. Then I accepted his recommendation and smoked once and suddenly expired the smoke, then he advised me to inspire the smoke into chest; only is such a case you can taste its real pleasure! And I did so. And so I always tasted that pleasure, I was smoking soundlessly and silently and hidden, at first one, then two, three… finally reached one box (20 cigarettes) and less than 20 couldn’t satisfy my mode; finally my chest was full of smoke and puss and developed caught. My job was a job that required dealing with various type people, because for selling snuff I had to go every where and sale to every one wanted it, and it was a benefit business for me. As I had good morale and so every body trust me and loved me too,

من پسری ده ساله بودم که دفعه اول یکی از دوستانم یعنی پسر خاله ام به من سگرت را تعارف کرد من هم از روی بچگی آن را قبول کردم و یک کش به آن زدم  فورآ دود آن را از دهانم خارج کردم ولی باز هم اصرار ورزید که دود آن را قورت دهم تا به سینه ام برسد  در ضمن برایم گفت آن وقت است که مزه سگرت را می فهمی منهم این کار را انجام دادم  این نیز اولین عامل بود که باعث شد هر روز این کار را انجام دهم  بی صدا و غافلانه سگرت می خریدم و می کشیدم همین یکی کم کم تبدیل به دو عدد تبدیل به سه عدد و به تدریج روزی به خود آمدم که اگر روزانه یک بسته سگرت را نمی کشیدم تاب و طاقت نمی آوردم همین باعث شد که سینه ام سراسر دود و چرک شد که موجب سرفه ام گشت و اما شغل من شغلی بود که با همه نوع انسان ها سرو کار داشتم من در کشور ایران برای فروختن نصوار به کوره ها می رفتم  آن را در میان مردم به فروش می رساندم که در آمد بسیار خوبی داشتم  به خاطر اخلاق خوبی که داشتم همه من را بسیار دوست داشتند 

البته نه تنها با من عادت کرده بودند بلکه در صورت اعتماد زیادی که به من داشتن تمام اموال گرانبها و پول نقد خودرا به من می سپردند  من هم در امانت داری آنها سعی و کوشش زیادی می کردم در صورت که در میان آنها یک معامله گر بسیار کلانی شده بودم و ارسال هر نوع پول از یک کشور به کشور دیگر به دست من بود  یک آدم پولدار و سرمایه دار شده بودم البته باکشیدن سگرت سینه ام خراب شده بود با هر گونه دوا و داکتری خوب نشد بعدآ این موضوع را به چند تن از دوستانم تشریح کردم  آنها هم راه حلی جدید را پیش پایم نهادند و پیشنهاد کردندبه جای سگرت از نصوار استفاده کنم تا بتوانم سگرت را ترک کنم شروع به کشیدن نصوار کردم  نصوار هم باعث شد گلویم چرکی شود باز به داکتر مراجعه کردم  ولی هیچ فایده نداشت

All were familiar with me and they always trust at me and put their valuable goods and money with me and I was keeping them confidentially and was trying to do my work better. Finally I was a great dealer between them, as I was able to transfer every kind of currency from one country to other, and consequently I became rich man and had capital, but as I was smoking cigarette I got chest problem. I went to many doctors for its remedy but no one could help me, finally I shared the problem with my peers, and they suggested using snuff instead of cigarette, if I could leave smoking cigarette and I started to use snuff and it induced sore throat for me. I went again to doctor if he could treat me but, without any benefit.

 بعضی از دوستانم گفتند ضرور نیست پیش داکتر بروی لازم است که فقد یکی دو بار تریاک بزنی اول خیلی می ترسیدم که معتاد نشوم ولی به اصرار زیاد  آنها مجبور شدم یکی دو دفعه این کار را انجام دادم البته موثر هم بود  لذت زیادی هم داشت و باعث می شد که من شاداب و نیرومند شوم  فکرم بیشتر از پیش کار می کرد آنقدر این کار را انجام دادم تا روزی به خود آمدم که ای دل غافل دیگر اسیر دام این بلا شدم چند سالی این عمل را که باعث ویرانی زندگی و اموالم گشت ادامه دادم که درآخر سر فهمیدم که دیگر هیچ چیزی در بساط ندارم طوری که حتی پدر و مادر، زن و فرزندانم ، اقوام و دوستانم از من دوری می کردند البته خودم هم خسته شده بودم راستش را بگویم از 

خودم بدم آمده بود روزی از روز ها که متوجه شدم دیگر از همه جا و همه کس نا امید شدم با غرور از جا برخا ستم و با اعلاناتی که در تلویزیون دیده بودم که می گفت ترک اعتیاد بودن درد پیش داکتر مراجعه کردم داکتر بادیدن من چنین سوال کرد چی می کشی گفتم تریاک با لحن خشن و با لهجه بسیار زشتی به من گفت تریاک می کشی البته با فریاد گفت منهم بسیار بدم آمدم و با عصبانیت برخاسته  به خانه برگشتم از همانجا از هر چی داکتر بود بدم آمده بود برای همین است که تا حال با شما کدام صحبتی نکرده ام چون فکر می کردم که تمام داکتر ها مثل هم هستند خشن ولی حالا که شما را دیدم و شناختم  فهمیدم که واقعآ دلسوز هستید و می خواهید به ما کمک کنید و من تصمیم گرفته تمام ماجرا را به طور خلاصه برایتان نوشتم . امیدوارم که به خاطر رفتار بدم من را عفو کنید البته خواهشمندم که حد اکثر کمک رااز من دریغ نکنید بعد از خدا امیدم به شما است تا کمک ام کنید که من خود را از این منجلاب بیرون بکشم و زندگی خود را از نو شروع كنم

some of my peers suggested that no need to go to doctors, just once or twice use opium and you will be OK for ever, at first I was afraid not to become an addict to opium, but as they wished so much finally I was forced to perform their recommendation, definitely, it worked and I felt lots of pleasure and it made me stronger and fresher and was able to think properly, and I continued for so long time that finally I discovered and felt  that I am  drowning in the flood, and there is no way to go out of it and so I continued for few years more that destroyed my life and finally I lost my every thing, nothing remained for me, even my mother, father, wife, my close relatives and peers took distance from me, definitely, I was bore with my self and really did not love my self. One day I was hopeless from every side, bravely stood in my place, because I heard in TV that declared” leaving addiction is associated with pains” and went to doctor, during visit the doctors asked me few questions, what are you smoking? I replied “Opium”, then he became angry at me and said very loudly” are you smoking opium!?” then I also became nervous and returned to home, and after that I hate all the doctors and for that reason I didn’t spoke any word with you yet, as I thought all the doctors are the same( nervous , rigid and irritable), but by meeting you now and introduction with you I found that you are really kind people and definitely want to help us, and I decided to write all the events as a summery for you. I am sorry for my bad attitude with you and wish to bless me and help me maximally, and after God Almighty I hope you to help me, if I could come out of drug flood and start a new life.

THE BEGINNING OF A DISASTER

Narrated by: 24 years old ex-drug addict, a client of the Residential and Community Outreach Drug Treatment Centre 

Years ago, I was living in Pakistan, while my family headed by my father was living in Afghanistan, my father was running a business of buying and selling used vehicles in Logar province.

He asked me to go to Logar to join the family and to look after the business.

I arrived to Logar and start working at the family business, it was my bad lack that I got to know a girl in our village and fall in love with her, it was a bad lack because my father a man with very strong principles, did not like the family of the girl.

I discussed the issue with my parent and asked them to arrange our engagement for marriage. But they have strongly rejected, they refused to explain the issue in details, and simply instructed me not to see the girl again and to stop thinking about her.

After some time, my father informed that the girl has been engaged to another man. I was so deeply depressed, and disappointed that I decided to commit a suicide, I toke a gun and shoot the bullet, when I opened my eyes, I found myself in a hospital in Peshawar. My uncle who lived in Peshawar was sitting beside my bed, and was extremely delighted to see that I was back to life, he has immediately informed that whatever my father told me was a lie and that he will help me to get to my love. After discharge from the hospital I preferred to stay with my uncle, our marriage was arranged without any involvement of my father.

I was living with my wife in Peshawar, I was working as driver, and we were having a very happy life. But, my father has considered this as a big failure for himself and for the entire family; he thought he has lost me. Instead of accepting the reality he intended to marry other women from our village to me as well (second marriage). 

One day, I found my wife so upset that she was crying, she informed me that the second marriage has already been arranged, and that I will be having a second wife very soon, she said she will not be able to tolerate it. I was deeply angry about the act of my father, but, I had no choice other then to accept the second marriage as otherwise it might have been a big shame for the family of the second wife, even they could have killed me or my father or some body else from our family in order to get the revenge.

After the second marriage my life has changed for the worse, my first wife was not happy anymore, and I did not like my second wife, our every day life was a terrible experience.

I asked a driver friend for advice, he said that I should take it easy and has invited me to have a “ Cigreetee” (cigarette full of hashish), if you smoke hashish the life will look different and much easier and the stress will be gone, he said; so I have started with Hashish. 

One day, while I was driving a big vehicle and was sleepless and tired, a driver recommended eating opium, he promised that it will relax me and will give extra power, so I toke it, and liked it better than Hashish. I used to eat opium whenever I was tired or when I was with my friends during the evenings, at the beginning I was feeling well but gradually I became addicted. I used opium for two years. 

After two years I have moved to Logar in Afghanistan and opened a grocery shop. Quickly I have found many friends some of whom were also addicted to opium and some to heroin.  A close friend that happened to be heroin addicted was coming regularly to the shop and was smoking heroin in a dark room attached to the back of my shop. One day he invited me to try heroin and I cheerily accepted without knowing that this was the beginning of a disaster in my life. After using heroin for one year I started to lose weight and became very pale and weak.

My father has requested the local drug treatment centre for help, I was visited by outreach workers in my shop, and they continued to visit me regularly and motivated me for a decision to stop the habit. After counseling and motivation I became ready for treatment, and was referred to the Residential Drug Treatment Centre of Gardez. I have successfully completed the one month treatment at the centre. 

Now I am free of drugs and running my life normally. I have restarted my shop, but decided not to allow anyone to use drugs inside my shop, I have informed my ex- friends (drug addicts) about possibilities of treatment and continue to encourage them to chose a drug free life; I have two wives and three kids, I am aware of my responsibilities toward them and am very happy and grateful that I am finally able to fulfill my responsibilities.

COMPULSION

Narrated by a female client of OTCD Community Outreach Drug Treatment Centre in Faizabad, Badakhshan provicne 

Prepared by: Shafiqa Saidi health worker

We were a happy family, living in Sheghnan district of Badakhshan, we were poor but happy; my father was a farmer, my mother was a housewife; with fourteen years of age I was the oldest among the children, for me life was a gift, I considered myself like a flower in the spring, and I thought the spring will be forever. But alas I was falls; I was destroyed in the fourteenth spring of my life. 

My father used to supply food and other commodities from Faizabad city, one day in his way back from the city he was badly injured in a car accident, he lost a hands and a leg in a surgical operation in the hospital, he was alive but not able to work any more. 

As a closest relative in the village my cousin’s husband offered to look after us, he meanwhile requested to marry me while I was a student of grade 7. He was already married two times but both wives were dead. My parent has rejected at the beginning but latter they had no choice other then to accept it since otherwise we could have lost the support of this man which was vital for the whole family at such a critical time.

Without willing, I was married to a person with three times more age than me, with a man who had many children. 

After the marriage we continued to stay in our father’s house for three years, finally my husband asked me to go with him to his house, he told me that if I go it will be fine, otherwise he has to go alone and I can stay! My father forced me to go.

in my husband house we were very poor, I did not know that my husband was addicted to opium; while I was pregnant there was nothing to eat for days except some bread with dry berries and water, I have gradually developed general body pain, but there was no health services available in our place and I had no where to go to seek medical services, instead my husband asked me to take some opium, he said it helps to get ride of the pain; it was true I felt relaxed and calm after smoking opium; I liked to smoke opium many time a day and was feeling better, without knowing that I am developing the habit, the addiction. 

After sometime I give birth to a drug addicted baby, this was my first child, after a while I was pregnant for the second time with twins, short after delivery both babies died due to lack of care and basic health services, may be they too were affected by the poison of opium in my body, how knows?

After delivery, I was suffering from different health problems including gynecological disorders and general body pain and fever, but again there was lack of even basic health services and the only drug available was opium, and I knew how to use it! After having used opium for about ten years I have changed to heroin.

We were informed by a friend in our village about the treatment possibilities at the Zendagi-Nawin treatment services in Faizabad city; me and my husband decided to come to the centre and sought help for both of us and for our only son, to treat ourselves and to bring to a close to the tragedy of our lives.

My message to other addicts is “Go and treat yourselves as soon as possible and stop opium and heroin to destroy you and your lives.

FEMALE DRUG USER FROM KANDAHAR

Narrated by: 45 years old female drug addict

Prepared by: Torpekay, social worker 

I am a 45 years old mother of seven children, four daughters and three sons, from Kandahar. My marriage was arranged in a young age with my cousin; my husband was a simple worker, but we were having a happy simple life. 

But this was not long.

Our simple life has changed when we have nominated (engaged) our older daughter to her cousin without her agreement; according to the tradition we have fixed a price of four hundred thousand Afghanis (equal to USD 8,000) to be paid to us in exchange of our daughter by the weeding time. As there were limited working opportunities in Kandahar he went to Iran to earn the money for their weeding. 

After almost three years we were very sad to hear a rumor that he has become addicted to opium in Iran. Our daughter was deeply sad and in big grief, finally after some time she fled with another boy, we have searched every where but could not find them. 

it was a big shame for us, people were saying bad things, most importantly we were very much concerned about the future of our other three daughters, I knew that after this scandal there will be no body to marry them, their future was destroyed, I was deeply sorry and in big grief, I lost my sleep and even I was not able to do the daily house work.

A lady in our neighborhood advised me to take it easy, “leave it to good, every thing will be fine at the end”, she said, she also gave me a bit of opium, she said she is also using it and that it helps, “if you take it your sleep will be restored and you will feel much better”, as I was desperate, I have accepted, it was really helpful, I was feeling much better and relaxed, and I had a perfect sleep, it was a good remedy, whenever I was reminded about my daughter I was reminded to take opium, so I used it very frequently and got used to it and addicted.

But, this was a short remedy, I soon realized that I was becoming weak and drowsy; even I was not able to speak normally or to have normal relation with people, I was eager to be alone in a lonely room all the times, my only friend was opium. I have soon forgotten to think even about our lost daughter nothing to say about my other children. 

I was getting money from my husband using variety of tricks to buy opium, finally my husband became aware of my addiction and my life became more and more problematic.  He added to my grief by being angry and being aggressive, he even told me that he will be very happy to see that I am dead, but what could I do? I was not able to stop any more.

Thanks to good that after almost seven years, finally, I was found by the female workers of the drug treatment centre of Kandahar. They have nicely talked to me, about my problems and solutions, they informed about treatment opportunities in Kandahar. At the beginning it was difficult to agree to stop opium, but they were not going to give up, they continued to come over and over, finally I was able to make my mind and to accept their support; a treatment program was set up for me, the staff of the treatment centre were coming to visit me twice a week for check up and counseling, every fifth day I was provided with some medicines, they have also assisted in solving our family issues by involving my husband and children. 

Thanks to good that I was treated and could become once again drug free and a normal human being; now it is almost six months that I do not use any medicine; it is like a re-born, I have started new life.

I am preying for every staff of the treatment of centre who have rescued my life.

DIGNITY

Narrated by a male drug addict under treatment 

My story begins when I was living with my family in Mashhad; located in northeastern Iran. At the age of 15 I had stop education at grad 8 and move to Tehran for work to support my family. 

while living with my grand parents in Tehran, I started working in a cotton industry, where I have found many friends, regrettably, I chose the wrong ones that were using drugs; it was not easy to be away from family and to cope with the hardship of daily life at such a tender age, I wanted to go out, the most important thing was to have have sociable friends, I wanted to be with them and enjoy myself, for me every thing else was nonsense. The first drug I tried with these friends was opium.

I was already addicted when I returned to Mashhad, I stopped for sex months, but relapsed and continued using opium until  I have tried my first heroin after which I could not enjoy opium anymore, it was simply not giving me the hit, so I have shifted to heroin which I smoked for almost a year when I reached to the point that it was also not enough, so I have started injecting heroin and sex month latter I have started a much stronger substance called Crystal

Although my family was already suspicious about my habit but I could hide it somehow and pretend that nothing is wrong. But, they have finally discovered that I was addicted, it was so obvious from my face and general appearance that I could not hide it anymore; at the same time, I have returned with my family to Afghanistan, my parents told me that if I do not stop drug it will be a shame for the whole family; so the strong family pressure and the new environment in Afghanistan mad me to stop drugs for almost six months.

We were in Afghanistan when some old friends were departed from Iran to Afghanistan, they came to our house and were staying with us as guests, they were still using drugs, I think I had weak determination, I forgot all the miseries drug caused to me and restarted heroin.

Now it is almost two years since I am again using heroin, I am not able to work any longer and to support my family, rather they have to carry my burden on their shoulders, I am ashamed, I have created many problems for my family, they tried so hard to help me to stop drugs but they could not succeed, may because I was not determined, one more reason was the bad behavior of some of our family members toward me, specially my older brother who has beaten me many times and insulted me in front of other people.

I agree that addicts are different from ordinary people but after all an addict dose also deserve respect, as the saying says “a street dog dose also has dignity” nothing to say about a human being even if s/he is an addict.

I remember I was so much praised by every one during my childhood, they were showing me to other children as a good example, I was intelligent,  I could help my family; but now every body knew that I was addicted.

Finally my family specially my older brother started to understand and to help me, even one day when he saw that I was extremely desperate he give me money, I was surprised as my family did not used to give me money becouse they knew I will buying heroin,  when I was back to home in the evening I was intoxicated, my older brother has kindly spoke to me and advised to stop drugs, at that time I was better able to communicate with him, I was influenced by the way he was talking to me, and finally I have made my mind and decided to stop drugs for ever, what ever will happen I will stop drugs, I decided.

I was advised to go to SHAHAMAT centre in Heart; I came and applied for treatment, gradually I have reduced the amount of my daily dose until I reached to a minimum level so I was accepted in the residential treatment program.

Today is the tenth day of me being under treatment in the centre, I feel better, I appreciate the hard work and kindness of all personal of the treatment centre, I wish that all other drug addicts will also get the chance to get treatment, I pray for them and for the staff of SHAHAMAT centre of Herat. 

STRONGER THAN OPIUM

Narrated by a male drug addict treated by the OTCD Drug Treatment Centre of Kabul

I am not sure how to begin and from where to start my story.

I married when I was still a teenage, I was not able to complete my school education, it was the time of Dr. Najibulah (the ex-president), I joined military as a soldier, there were many soldier in our unit who were smoking Hasish, this was the time I have tried my first drugs and so the big tragedy of my life began.

After some months, I was sent to the frontline of the war, I was actively involved in the war, after being in the battle for almost one year I escaped and fled to Iran, while my family was still back in Afghanistan.

In Iran I was working in a house, the house owner was addicted, he was regularly using opium whilst keeping his opium with me, I was curious and interested to see how it works, so I gradually started to smoke opium and it has little by little replaced my habit of hashish. I was in Iran for some years until I returned to Afghanistan, it was the time when Taliban were in power, it was difficult to live here, so after being in Afghanistan for four years I went back to Iran but returned soon after collapse of the Taliban’s regime, where I found a job in a factory of production of cement-blocks.

Throughout all these years I was constantly using opium and was strongly addicted.

I remember the night in Kabul when a friend has asked me to try something he described as ten time stronger than opium, it was Heroin, I smoked my first Heroin at our guest room and forgot all the pains and grieve of life, but the day after I had bad pain all over my body. Next evening, he give me a call and invited me for another free smoke of Heroin, I have eagerly accepted and got my second free Heroin; at the same time, he has provided the name and address of the Heroin supplier, so I have started to buy my own Heroin and was smoking it for almost one a half year, finally I have reached to the point that I could not work any more and was suffering a lot.

Ater all, a good friend informed me about the treatment possibilities available at the Zendagi-Nawin treatment centre in Kabul and has introduced me to a social worker of the centre who has helped me to get enrolled in the treatment as I was fed up with my addiction. After being in the preparation period for almost three months I was accepted in the treatment program and got treated.

Thanks to GOD and the workers of the OTCD Centre who have helped me to get ride of the addiction and to come back to a normal, healthy life, now I have a job and so can serve my family and the community.